Do You Know How to Put the "Good" in Goodbye?
Here’s an indisputable fact of life.
Eventually, when it comes to work, almost every one of your relationships (yes, even the most awesome ones) will come to an end.
People relocate. Organizations merge. Better opportunities come along. People get promoted. Business environments change. Creative differences emerge.
And even though you might not be able to fathom this right now, it’s going to happen.
Don’t believe me?
Check out the following EXTRAORDINARY relationships that all crashed and burned.
McCartney and Lennon. Can’t Buy Me Love. (I literally cried when this happened.)
Simon and Garfunkel. Sounds of Silence.
Shaq and Kobe. Rejected!
Lucy and Desi. Waaaaaaaaah!
Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon. Fare thee well.
Tom Brady and Bill Belichik. Doink!
Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. Total blue screen of death.
Now, having reviewed the demise of some of these once-great relationships, I need you to repeat after me: “At some point, this is going to happen to me.”
But here’s the thing.
Although your working relationships are all one-day going to end, they don’t have to end badly.
Let’s dive in.
Here’s Why Putting the “Good” in Goodbye Matters
As difficult as it may be, Leaders of Light understand the importance of ending every relationship on a good note.
Here’s why putting the “good” in goodbye matters.
Reputation: Ending a relationship on good terms ensures that the other person speaks positively about you (and the organization!). In essence, if you do this right, the other person will act as a supportive and strong brand ambassador moving forward.
The Boomerang Effect: People who leave on good terms are more likely to return later with new skills and experience. And this is AWESOME when it happens!
Networking and Partnerships: Ending on a positive note often leads to future business opportunities, partnerships, and/or referrals to top talent.
Morale of Remaining Employees: Make no mistake: current staff observe how people are treated when you (as a Leader of Light!) end a relationship. Said another way, professional, respectful offboarding proves that you value other people. This, in turn, improves retention and builds goodwill among those who stay.
Knowledge Transfer: A positive exit process ensures the departing person is more willing to share knowledge and properly transition their responsibilities so that nothing falls through the cracks.
This is a very big deal.
Reduced Risk: Last but not least, treating people well as a relationship comes to a close reduces the likelihood of negative on-line reviews, badmouthing, and/or litigation.
If you don’t think this matters, imagine a bad break-up with hundreds of thousands of people watching (and, worse yet, weighing in!).
Here’s How to Put the “Good” in Goodbye
As a Leader of Light, ending a business relationship with care requires a direct, professional, and empathetic approach.
Here’s how you can get the job done right.
First, The Details: Always, always, always honor your word and your commitments. Many times, this requires extraordinary patience—but it’s worth it.
That said, before ending a business relationship, first check for formal termination clauses, notice periods, and/or contractual obligations to ensure compliance and to avoid legal issues.
Nothing (and I repeat, NOTHING) is worse than having to sort through the details in a relationship that’s already run its course.
Face-To-Face Is The Only Way: Do not “ghost” or avoid the conversation. Speak directly to the person in a video call or in an “in-person” meeting to express your decision clearly.
Remember, ending a relationship face-to-face is crucial for showing respect, ensuring clarity, and providing emotional closure—and these are what help both parties move forward.
This practice also fosters empathy, minimizes misunderstandings (common with digital communication!), and allows for honest, in-person dialogue.
Be Honest but Kind: Clearly explain why you are ending the relationship—such as a misalignment in vision or changing needs—without being mean or accusatory. (HINT: it’s all about FIT not FAULT!)
This is important because being honest, when ending a relationship, is crucial to providing closure, preventing unnecessary pain, and respecting the partner. Moreover, it eliminates confusion, allowing both parties to learn from the experience, and enabling everyone to move forward without resentment.
In the end, it’s honesty (and a calm, cool demeanor!) that ultimately helps you maintain personal integrity and the respect of the other person.
Be Grateful: Don’t miss this. Every goodbye should begin with a sincere “thank you” for the opportunity or the value they provided in the past.
While it’s counterintuitive, gratitude is what shifts your perspective from victimhood to learning. This, in turn, helps you recognize valuable lessons and keep positive memories. It also acts as a tool to manage emotions, thus reducing fear and anger to facilitate closure.
Create a Transition Plan: While it may be hard, it’s in your best interest to offer to help transition files, projects, or accounts to a new provider to minimize disruption.
To do this, you will need a transition plan.
In fact, a transition plan is essential when ending a relationship because it ensures emotional stability, minimizes conflict, and manages practicalities like finances and housing. But, perhaps most importantly, it allows both parties to act with dignity and kindness, as well as foster a healthy closure—thus preventing messy, reactive, and/or abusive scenarios.
Follow Up in Writing—With Tact: Sending a formal, polite email or letter documenting the end of the relationship just to make sure all parties are aligned is a great closing move.
NEVER, EVER, EVER Talk Poorly About That Relationship To Others: Here’s one last golden nugget to help you seal the deal. Never, ever, ever talk poorly about that person to other people.
Remember, it takes two to tango. Rarely (translated never) is the demise of a relationship just the fault of one person.
What’s more, if you want to put this thing to bed, play nice. (Said differently, no smack talk EVER.)
Leading with LIGHT
It’s never easy to end a business relationship. But, eventually, it’s something we are all going to have to do.
By following the hard-earned and hard-learned wisdom put forth in the paragraphs above, you can avoid a lot of headaches AND even more heartaches.
What’s more, if you end relationships the right way, you will soon find that good endings make space for good beginnings.
Never forget, sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
Until next time, see light, be light, and spread light in ways that only you can!
Until Next Time...
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